Was that a compliment?

Society today speaks so much of political correctness. Personally, I may not fit into this category as a whole. My favorite quote is by Dr. Seuss. "Be who you are and say what you feel because the people who mind don't matter and the people who matter don't mind." Believing in one's self and having a healthy self confidence is important to me. Also, Einstein said, "The true definition of insanity is doing the same thing again and again expecting different results." Having said that...
Why isn't it alright to tell someone who is overweight things such as, "Gosh, your back end looks like it has grown to the size of a dumpster truck. Maybe you should lose some weight?" I would never say things like this to someone struggling with their self image for reasons unknown to me! I knew a woman who looked obese. I know her situation well. She suffers from a disease that causes her tissue to store fluid in her abdomen and legs. She was miserable and near suicidal. She receive surgery that helped so much! She now is able to get around well and isn't burdened with the excess weight the fluid caused. I am so happy for her to be free to live a better life. Before I knew anything about her issues I looked at her with love and for who she was not what she looked like. I do not like to judge or be presumptuous about things I know not of! It may shock you but I know very little and recognize this about myself.
On the other end of the spectrum is people who are skinny. I believe that curves make a woman beautiful. After having three daughters, my "curves weighed in at 165 pound. I started my pregnancies at a whopping 90 pounds. I am 5'1" tall. My frame is small. So, 165 pounds was tough to carry. I had lost a small amount of this first baby weight. Then came daughter number two. Another 65 pounds. Then daughter number three. Several years went by and I deiced I didn't like being so tired. So unhealthy. So unhappy in my own skin. "I have the power to change this" I thought. So I started eating healthier while exercising six days a week. Living in Alaska I mountain biked, played soft ball, skied and did step aerobics.
Now after 15 years I have kept the weight off by continuing my healthy lifestyle. I run and walk in intervals. I am very active. I love eating so I am careful what I choose to eat and when I know I would like a dark beer or two I adjust my meals accordingly. I have made a lifetime goal to like who I am and make decisions I will not regret.
Back to the original issue. I have been met with statements like, "You are too skinny, you need to gain weight!" (I am on the high end of the healthy weight for my height and have gained weight in muscle by exercising by the way) "Do you eat enough?" "Are you sick because you are really skinny!" These comments are not to be confused with ones that are spoken with love and concern by people who mean to be protective of me. These particular comments are said with twisted expressions and furrowed brows. Wrinkled noses and squinting eyes. Contempt are the fuel by which they are propelled.
To say the least these comments are hurtful and mean. They are NOT compliments. They are angry and sad. I struggle with them. Parts of me would like to say, "If you want what I have do what I did to get it!" I usually just walk away. Ignorance is no excuse but I don't think these people realize why they are even commenting in the first place.
So cyberspace, if you come across someone who is thin...don't automatically assume they are anorexic or bulimic. That they have an eating disorder at all. Maybe, just maybe, they have worked really hard to love themselves enough to be healthy. Work hard enough to make a different life for themselves and continue the work to keep it! Backwards is no direction I ever want to go! If you want to compliment someone who is thin here are some suggestions... You sure are beautiful. What a lovely person you are. Your energy and enthusiasm sure are contagious! Your presence makes this room bright!
Beauty is completely from within. I want to have such a beautiful inner being that it shines outwardly and impacts the world around me. Now I just have to work on my attitude about the ignorance of those around me. I must not judge. I must love them anyway. That is who I am. I have control over what I believe and how I feel!